Celebration of the Life of Brenda Tate
Sermon for the Stone Gatherers
Ecclesiastes 3:1-15
When I was young, just in primary school, growing up in Korea, my family was introduced to a new technology. One day, when I came home after school, my Dad was carefully setting up a video player in the living room! For the first time, we could watch our favourite things as much as we liked. A few years later, my Dad bought a new Disney video for me: Beauty and the Beast, in English. I couldn’t quite understand the English dialogue, but I was so mesmerized by the story and enchanted by the music, I watched it over and over and over, and at my favourite parts, I would stop the tape, rewind it back a few minutes, and replay it to experience the story again. I bet that most of you have had the same experience - you watch a movie or listen to music, and there are especially beautiful moments where you want to – you must - stop, and replay. Our life journey is just like that. There are always moments where we want to pause, to remember by heart, to replay, to keep forever.
What brings us all here today is our desire to commemorate and relive the precious moments, the beautiful moments, the loving moments, the joyful moments, the truly lived moments of life that Brenda shared with us all. “Brenda loved life. That’s truth. Brenda’s love of life was infectious,” her Dear One, Bob, said to me.
As I prepared for Brenda’s Celebration of Life, I tried to replay those moments that Brenda and I had of getting to know each other. I always loved to see Brenda when she came to church with Bob on Sunday mornings. Often, when Brenda came, it was when she signed up for being a greeter. Her job was to welcome people and hand out bulletins to those who came to the service. I had some favourite moments. On those mornings, Brenda’s feet were warm inside her Mukluks, charcoal suede with lovely grey fur bells hanging outside. Brenda also liked wearing fluffy or soft woolen tops. When Brenda hugged you, she would give you a long, warm hug. I would come to her and say, “So good to see you, Brenda.” and she would talk to me, looking me directly in the eyes, saying, “Oh, Ha Na…” That was our usual morning. In those moments which I just replayed, I travelled to a world, a beautiful world, which her heart was, a little girl wearing moccasins on her feet, growing her flowers, walking lightly on the land in which we all live…
Brenda didn’t say much after she said, “Oh, Ha Na...” But I think that Brenda's unsaid words were kind ones, spoken in her heart… When I visited her at St. Boniface Hospital, on one of her last days on earth, I said, “Brenda. I heard all your sons and your sister came to see you.” And on “sons” and “sister”, a very warm something quickly filled her eyes. She couldn’t say more, but she seemed to have a lot to say, a lot to thank, a lot to feel, in her mind, on her lips; her unspoken words were a light in her eyes!
After Brenda was gone, her family met with me at church. I was honoured to hear the stories of their very fond memories, the joyous times, when they replayed them for me. Brenda was a teacher, and when her sons were young, they all came back home from each of their schools at 3 pm. Three of them sat down at the kitchen table, while Brenda made food. The three talked about the things that were interesting on that day. Bob thanked Brenda and the Creator God who watched over all the moments of their two lives together, and then four lives together, and then five - - the “joyous decades” in which Bob and Brenda shared their love of life together, became parents, raised a family, went on road trips and many camping trips and travels, and where they welcomed their family’s newest member, their granddaughter Charlie.
Replay. Replay. Replay. The best moments live on in our memories.
The week that Brenda passed away, Bob came to church on Sunday morning. Brenda’s best friend Lynne was there for him, and our member Wendy also sat close to him to give support. I was honoured to read and share what Bob wrote to announce the death of Brenda to our congregation. He replayed, “Brenda and I were alone together late that last evening, we hugged and kissed, and recalled forty years of marriage. Then she told me, “My program is finished here, I am ready to go home.” I said, “Good night sweetie, I love you.” We paused… in the moment. On that Sunday the Gospel reading was, “Blessed are the poor in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.”
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
“Blessed are the meek, for they will inherit the earth.”
Today’s reading was chosen by Brenda’s family. In this passage from Ecclesiastes, the poet shares the Word, “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven… A time to mourn, and a time to dance; a time to throw away stones, and a time to gather stones together.” Now is the time for us to gather stones of stories and thanks (show the stones) to celebrate the love of life, a true blessing to the earth. We give thanks to the Creator for the life and for the love of life Brenda shared with us, that has brought us all here today. We are here together to replay the precious moments, the beautiful moments, the loving moments, the joyful moments, the truly lived moments of life that we were privileged to share with Brenda. May a new hope, a new joy, be re-lit and rekindled in our hearts and prayers, in this hour and for evermore. May God keep Brenda on her final journey towards Eternity; the spirit being, the child of God, who was loved, is loved and will be loved among her people, the Creator’s people, us, the stone throwers and gatherers. Let us make our joy, let us make our love of life truly inspiring.
Ha Na Park
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